Sunday, 18 September 2011

A Brave New World

I believe I'm old enough to not give a damn what people say or think. I no longer have a husband to comment, diss or criticise me.

My daughter has left home and is miles away, she couldn't care less what her mum gets up to.

My son sneered at me and said, 'oh god no Mum you haven't.....!', when I told him what I had done. But that's fine... then he said, ' So this is a symbol of your new life, that you can do anything and you are staring over, an act of rebellion and courage, cos you can...!'and  we both laughed. I am always surprised at the depth of his quick thinking.

My fella just said 'OMG you've actually done it, send me a pic !'

My girlfriends are a mixed bag of,  'You go girl, it looks amazing, l've shown everyone in the pub!!'
to, ' OH Alice!' , the smell of disdain wafting down the phone and another pal  just hasn't responded! The  silence speaks volumes.

Admittedly, it rankles a little that my 17yr old son sneered and jeered a tad....but an hour later he asked if I wanted to watch a dvd with all is good there, (and of course he will want £££ for this and that, which is always a come back to Mum moment!)

But  the people I am most agitated about today, 24 hours later are my Mum and Dad!! They won't approve, I know. Just in the same way I didn't when my daughter had her first little one, then a humongous second one.....because I feel that they are a part of me still, an physical extension of my flesh and bone and I want them to retain that perfect purity I created and nurtured.

50 odd years later my folks may also feel this.... and so I  am still scared of my Mum and Dad and l can't bring myself to phone and tell them, cos I will hear that sigh of disappointment that I heard so many times in my teens and since, which I have often heard leaving my own mouth when my daughter and son expected anger from me, and instead a wave of nausea, fear, hurt washed over and left me clammy and bereft.

I thought well I don't need to tell them, they'd never know. But my life is no longer about secrets, feuds and discontentment.

Is it just me or do we all feel this way too.
                                                                        Once a child always a child eh?

hopeOh and yes you've probably guessed it. Yesterday I had a tattoo..

Alice x


  1. Next thing it will be a motor biker| How can you desecrate that lovely skin, you slag! You had every reason to worry about my reaction, you slag!

    You know I'm joking, just because I never had the nerve...Mind you, Pop's will say 'daft bugger'.

    Can't believe that you told the world that you are scared of us...just because we kept you locked in a cupboard for your teenage years-and micro-chipped so we knew where you were at all times. Not surprising that you are now kicking over the traces.

    Love you love lota and

  2. LOL I'm laughing because I had a tattoo when I was 48 and it took me 3 years to confess to my Dad!

  3. *giggles* You are one master of suspense, and all that for a sweet tatoo (hope my kids don't read that, they'll have ME microchipped!).

  4. P.S.: You said nothing about WHERE those birds are taking off!

  5. Where? how big? enjoy it anyway! and no matter how old we are we are still children to our parents........

  6. Moannie- doesnt matter how old your kids are we still dont want to disappoint you¬!

    akemalu- now l am giggling too!

    merisi- its on my butt and about 8 inches over the design

  7. i dread to think what JIM suldog will!!!

  8. Wow! You are still young enough to do it!
    I recently passed a very large girl in the street and there were so many tattoos on every visible inch of her body. I didn't like that.... but a delicate little thing on a shoulder is quite lovely!
    Really sorry about your daughter and I hope that one day she will become your best friend.Maybe she will come to her senses later on in life..
    Maggie X

    Nuts in May

  9. Isn't it strange that it's still hard to tell Mom and Dad even at our age...

    Congrats on the tattoo!!!

  10. I am SO excited for you .. I've wanted one forever but I am a coward and fear the pain ... so what did you have done and where?! Inquiring/nosy friends need to know ...

  11. My first reaction was you'd gone blonde! We demand a picture! Seriously, anyone who criticises is not worth worrying about. It's your life and your body and it is not self-harming, merely self decorating. I'm proud yopu've had the courage to do your own thing. Go Girl!

  12. So, Sara, is the tattoo that lovely dandelion and birds - How beautiful!

    I also hanker after a tatt...

    Nuff said, eh?! (As I'm not brave enough to get one, nor to have my nostril pierced which I've wanted to since I was 17!)

    Will see you soonest, will make arrangements soon, pwomise!

    So pwoud of you!

    Fhi xxx

  13. Funny how we still need our parents approval. Me too.

    However, it would not be a lie not to tell them, just an omission. Don't bring stuff to your door now that you don't need...after all, you're FREE.

    Enjoy my friend :-)

  14. OOps! Too late! forgot your mum read this!!

    I suppose a photo would be too much to ask!!!!!!!!!


  15. Tattoos are liberating, aren't they?!

    And I hid my first from some family members for years...actually, my granddad died happily ignorant of its existence! My children, however, think tattoos are perfectly normal. :)

  16. Funniest bit is your Mum's reaction on here... Does she say "you slag" in that Eastender's Mitchell brother way? LOL :-)

  17. if you think l'm gonna post a pic of my butt on this or any other blog.....!

    and yes FHina

    alice xxit is a version of the dandelion clock and birds/hope.....

  18. Alice
    I saw a picture of this when I was searching for tatooes of dandelion clocks-it is very beautiful I am seriously considering one now :-)
    x x x

  19. anonymous...yes its the pic that inspired mine and l love my tattoo...



Hey! thanks for joining me here,
as I gaze in awe and wonder and dwell in possibility...

I have tea, gin and wine and a very comfy armchair..

Alice x